The terms "Mindfulness," "Awareness," and "Paying Attention" are being used a lot these days. And for a good reason.
They are the most vital applied practices in your journey towards finding your well-being, balanced, and happier life.
Although used interchangeably, they are not the same!

They do, however, work together and complete each other in supporting positive change in our thought patterns and emotional habits.

There are, in fact, important differences between them both in how we implement them in our daily lives and the benefits of each one.
In this and the following two articles, I will examine the definition of each practice, what it means, Its benefits, and how you can easily apply it in your everyday life.

We know our relationships are more satisfying if we pay attention to one another.
Our business affairs require our attention.

All of this seems somehow self-evident. We know that attention is important, but we may not see that attention has direct biological results.
We think about attention as a "critical" function. Attention is not critical. Judgment is. Attention is neutral.

We begin to pay attention to something, and then we start to judge it, evaluate it, categorize it and, yes, generally "criticize" it.

Paying Attention

The truth is, we're living in a world that invites us NOT to pay attention. Technology, information, the pace we live, our collective addiction to constant stimulation – keep us off-balance and constantly distracted. 

Attention is the key to so many things related to our lives. We have to pay attention when we cross the street when we drive and to make sure we don't get into accidents that can cause physical harm (and worse).

When multitasking has become our norm, we have lost touch with paying attention, focusing, and concentrating on one thing. I call it single-tasking. 

We want to be seen and heard and receive full attention to our needs and wants, but do we even know what they really are?

Who doesn't want their relationships to be positive and feel understood and appreciated?

But how can any of this be if none of us are paying attention but rather living in divided attention on a bunch of things simultaneously?

We neither serve ourselves, our relationships, our families, nor our well-being. 

Developing a better ability to pay attention requires slowing down. Quieting your body and calming your mind, and taking care of yourself. 

Definition

As you can see, there are repeated elements, a common thread in these definitions:

Emphasis on Observing and Listening.

What you're paying attention to is worthy of care and interest.

There is a connection between paying attention and taking action; 

For the purpose of this article, I'll define Paying attention as:

"To be fully observant and present in the moment either with yourself, another person, an idea or a situation, gathering as much external and internal information."

What Does It Mean?

Paying attention is noticing and being with something without trying to change it or fix it.
It takes time to explore fully, discover whatever there is to know about something, and watch as things change by themselves without our trying to 'fix" anything.
Attention is patient, and attention is kind. No rush. No burden. No criticism.

The Benefits

• Know yourself. When you use your focused attention to notice what you feel and what emotions are arising in you, you will improve the connection between your brain and your body and learn what you want, feel, and need, which gives you a deep feeling of knowing and connecting with yourself.
• Be more present in your body and in the moment. Paying attention to your body grounds you. It connects you to your inner self and helps you be in the present moment.
• Make better decisions. Paying attention will help you see the bigger picture, which will help you be less reactive and more responsive with decision-making. When you pay attention to your emotional reactions to things, you will be empowered to make choices that serve you and others better.
• Connect with other people better. Knowing your emotions and feelings makes you more approachable, better at communicating, and easier to get along with. This affects how others perceive you.
• Other people will be more comfortable with you. Your ability to pay attention to others and yourself will make people feel better seen and heard (which is what we all want), which will allow them to show up more authentically with you. 
• Take better care of your health. Stress, anxiety, and repressed emotions affect our health and the immune system: back pain, hypertension, overeating, poor sleep, Neck pain, and many others. 
• Trust yourself more. Paying attention to your thoughts, opinions, actions, and behavior gives you a broader perception and the ability to make choices that serve you better. You will naturally learn from your own decisions and choices, fine-tuning yourself, increasing your confidence.
• You will experience life more fully. Simply put, the more attention you give to yourself, your life, and what you're experiencing and witnessing, the more you will be able to experience each day. Your world will become richer, with more depth and connection to life.

How Do We Practice Paying Attention?

By Paying attention to paying attention.

We listen, we watch, we observe, we consider something conscientiously, we're taking notice of something, and we're looking at it in a very detached way. 

Paying attention is listening to, watching, something or someone very carefully. Approaching it with careful regard as interesting or important. 

If we intend to fix, change, or reject something, our capacity to pay attention to it is actually minimized. We will see only as much as we think we need to see in order to take action. What if there is more to learn?

We pay attention by noticing and being with something without changing it. We give it the time and patience to fully explore, to discover whatever there is to know about. To observe and see as things change by themselves without our trying to 'fix' or 'change' anything. 

Paying attention is patient and kind. No rush. No burden. No criticism.

How do we let go of  judgment and simply pay attention?

Frank Ostaseski, the founder of the Metta Institute, teaches the art of paying attention. He describes it as: "Welcome Everything; Push Away Nothing."

Why would we "welcome" something unpleasant? The way he explains it is that the word "welcome," although confronting us, is also asking us to look without judgment and criticism. It invites us to be open to whatever comes, to pay attention simply.

The more you pay attention, without pushing away or judging what is happening, the more you'll learn about yourself, others, and any situation - The more you pay attention, the more your brain can start the process to rewire what's necessary to help you. 

It really is that fundamental. 

Paying attention is the key.

And Paying attention is ultimately an act of loving-kindness towards yourself.

We are not different from children. Just like kids thrive when paid attention to, we too thrive with attention, and as adults, we can give that attention to ourselves.

Bottom Line

Paying attention to what you pay attention to is a simple point.
When we pay attention, we become aware. We pay attention to our thoughts and the emotion we are experiencing through this thought.
We listen, we watch, we consider something cautiously, we're taking notice of something, and we're looking at it in a very detached way.
It's just paying attention to what is happening in front of us and inside us.
A detached state of observation.

Paying attention brings something to our awareness; it helps us focus our awareness on a particular aspect of ourselves, our environment, important decisions, or the thoughts in our heads.

Now that we paid attention, we can move on to our next key practice: awareness.

Stay tuned and pay attention to the next upcoming article.